Promises

I find they work best when you keep them.

I promised a dear friend, a friend in need of tenderness right now, that the next installment would feature cats.

So, while I have written numerous other musings, reflections and story-inflections since my Mother’s Day Wish PSA, it is paramount for me to keep my word. Especially, as some of you already know¹, when the possibility of mitigating distress versus instigating is on the line.

For those joining newly, WELCOME. If you would like to find access to the inaugural and PSA posts and are having technical difficulties, please reach out and I will get my 14 yo on a zoom call with you to solve it. (Seriously! He’s that good:)

Starting from the beginning can be satisfying as well as helpfully orienting. Even still, for many, entering a ride from the exit has its own unique experience that is certainly worth exploring, if ever you wish. That being said (or written as is this particular case) entering a ride from its entrance can have built-in continuity worth enjoying when done with intention. Either, any or no way at all, whatever you choose, I hope you find JOY and magic in the meandering.

To understand this next part of the story, you must first be introduced to Zeus.

A soft-as-medium-haired-jet black-cat-hair can be, Zeus has eyes as gold as the Harvest Moon in Autumn. He has secret white patches that will remain secret, because I promised, and you know where I stand, sit and lie (no not, lie) on promises. Anyway, it was love at first sight when our eyes locked at the animal shelter. He, sitting in Cat Pose on a tower platform many feet above my head. I, standing on tip-toes, trying not to bobble to stay steady with his head.

Zeus was a very scared big kitten. 9 months old and it took three days before he’d let us pet him.

Yet, once he did, the trust he entrusted was the balm to my invisible injury.

This was the first time Zeus saved my life. I had sustained a life-threatening injury to my soul 78 days earlier. Only one person saw it happen. (That’s another story for a very different journey).

When I stumbled home I stayed awake for 78 days straight. You don’t believe me, and had Zeus already been with me he would have seen, except then it wouldn’t have been true, because the entire reason he joined me was to watch over me so I could finally sleep. Which brings us to the thing about cats and dogs.

While many dogs, including the dogs we’ve been blessed to shelter with, love to be in tight packs with us, they sleep on the floor next to me. They sleep under my feet as I watch TV. They cover my toes as I blow my own nose. It’s impossible to tell if they are awake once they sleep. And for someone with insomnia from trauma-induced catatonia, being alone in the silence of a sleeping home is nothing but recurring hell-in-California.

Cats, on the other hand, never promise to follow you. They are indifferent to packs, unless they are paper sacks in which case they will take 5 and ignore you all the more. Except when you’re in distress. Then all form of whiskers stand at solemn attention to act as anttenae for the ever-stoic defendae.

Plus, they purr.

And this is the part that matters most when everyone is sleeping, even a ghost.

Being alone, feeling alone, feeling one is being left alone in one’s own fully-filled home, is a terrible feeling when hanging by a thread.

I felt like I was at risk of dying the first time I met Zeus. And I didn’t want to die alone.

Last week, I didn’t know I was so close to dying. Even still, I didn’t want to be alone.

Zeus’ purr saved my life. Twice.

I’ll tell you about the second time, next time.

Until then, grab a friend. Perhaps one that purrs. Consider one who is soft. And give them a gentle squeeze, (of course only if they please) and thank them for their companionship on this journey around the Sun. It is so much more fun when done with more than one!

I am so happy YOU ARE HERE.

1. See inaugural story, “What are you waiting for?” if you wish for a brief introduction to understanding my need to mitigate distress and avoid creating any. It is not required reading, and I promise (and you already know my position on promises) additional details will follow in the future to deepen this context. I cannot promise which future, when or in what way. I am just certain it will, becasue I can.